I feel like he is already emotionally committed, and that he doesn’t want to “screw it up.” It’s putting a lot of pressure on me.
I (she/her) started using Ok Cupid recently, and a couple days ago, my coworker (he/him) who I don’t know well but see around often (we work at a very small company) sent me a message.
I know it can be fun to send a couple silly messages back and forth when you see your friends on these sites without making it weird, but I don’t think this is that.
Anyway, if I see coworkers on dating sites, I think the polite thing to do is just ignore it and move along, so I was not super into the fact that this guy messaged me but I figured he was just being kind of socially obtuse.
His message implied that he was going to ask me out “until he realized who I was,” which made me immediately uncomfortable.
Men who use these dating apps tend to be those who are looking for something specific or doesn’t present themselves well in pictures alone. There’s a reason why some men are using these dating applications over the more popular swipe based dating apps.
The majority of the dating advice here will be for men.
This shows that you read her profile, demonstrates unique effort, and helps differentiate you from countless people who just message “Hi”.
In terms of effort, a well crafted message takes more effort than an insulting generic message but should result in higher response rate.
This depends on your target demographic, but some good examples would be pictures of you skiing or on a cruise with friends. Women get tens to hundreds of messages per day, especially young good looking ones. The first is a well thought out message that’s specific to her profile.